Every Saturday morning, without fail, my sister Joanne and I meet for coffee at our favorite cafe. When the weather is nice we sit outside and the waitress who has been serving us for years brings us our order without even having to ask us what we want. We have comfort food and girl talk, and it's the highlight of my week.
So, it was Saturday morning and we were re-hashing the week's events and I found myself voicing the same old lament . . . that my boyfriend of three years was never going to make a serious commitment to our relationship. At 45, I was ready to settle into something more than just a steady weekend date.
Even though Joanne listened patiently I sensed that she was distracted, and I finally asked her what was so interesting behind me? She leaned toward me and whispered, "Don't turn around, but there's a guy behind you with a hat and sunglasses that looks like he's trying to eavesdrop. I wonder if he's delusional and thinks he's a spy!" At that we giggled and continued our conversation in quieter tones.
A few seconds later I heard the chair behind me scrape the cement as our "spy" moved closer. This guy was definitely a kook who was much too interested in what we were saying. So I proceeded to launch into a tale of how I had met a fabulous bodybuilder earlier in the week and we were having a passionate affair. I added that I was thinking about breaking up with Thomas to run off with this new guy.
CRASH! In trying to strain to listen to what I was saying, the guy behind us actually fell over backwards, and I was so startled that I jumped up and managed to tip our whole table over -- coffee, toast and all. What a mess and what a noise! Everyone on the patio was looking at us!
I turned to give this guy a piece of my mind and absolutely could not believe the sight of my Thomas righting himself and his chair and trying to maintain some small semblance of dignity. "What on earth do you think you're doing?" I yelled.
"Well, believe it or not honey. This was a well-planned attempt to propose in a very unique and romantic way. It just didn't turn out exactly as I had planned!" With that, he pulled a diamond ring out of his pocket and took my hand.
"Janet, don't you even think about running off with some other guy! You're my girl, and I want you to be my wife! Will you marry me?"
Trying to hold back a combination of laughter and tears, I held out my hand for Thomas to slip the diamond on my finger. "Thomas, I'll call Fabio the minute I leave here and tell him the deal's off. I would love to be your wife."
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